Happiness is not something that can be bought or saved like money in a bank account. It has very little to do with how much money you have, or what car you drive or what house you live in. Happiness is like water. Here's why.
Video by Einzelgänger
Key Takeaways
Happiness is not static. It’s not that you do X + Y that leads to Z and you’ll be happy for the rest of your life.
Happiness is not something that can be bought or saved like money in a bank account. Also it has very little to do with how much money you have, or what car you drive or what house you live in.
How does happiness work?
Vacations, buying the latest technology or toys, relationships, cars, vacations etc…
All these things are temporary moments of joy that do not last.
A study in 1978 wanted to find out if happiness was relative. They studied 3 groups: lottery winners, paralyzed accident victims and a controlled group.
You would expect that a lottery winner would be than someone for example has lost a leg. Also you would expect a lottery winner would be way happier than a non-lottery winner. In other words, the controlled group.
A year after the occurrences:
The controlled group and the lottery winers were equally happy.
Lottery winners = slightly happier than the paralyzed accident victims
What does this say?
Happiness is relative.
A lottery winner is exctatic when they find out of the sum of money they will get. An accident victim may be devastated after finding out they might be paralyzed for the rest of their life.
When time passes, the level of happiness grow towards each other and almost the same. Nevertheless, most likely everyone would choose winning the lottery over losing a limb.
Could it be the pleasure that could be bought with it?
Pleasure is not happiness.
Buddha was a happiness seeker. Despite his unbelievable wealth, he was plagued by on going dissatisfaction. He decided to leave his over protected life in the palace and was confronted with the sufferings of the world.
Being immersed with pleasures his whole life, which made him miserable, he decided to go the opposite direction—asceticism.
He starved himself eating only one grain of rice a day, and inflicted all kinds of pain on to himself. After years of ascetic practices, he concluded that this did not work.
He found a middle way through meditation, which enlightened him under the Bodhi tree.
Immersing himself with pleasure didn’t make him happy. Immersing himself with pain didn’t make him happy. When he gave up, enlightenment sneaked up on him, and his suffering turned into a state of bliss.
Happiness is like water. No matter how much you shake it with pleasure, or stir it with pain, it will always try to return to a state of calmness. In that calmness, you will find bliss.
It doesn’t mean you need to meditate under a tree to be happy. Instead, stop trying and start doing.
Meditation is an act. The act of being in the moment, moving along with the unfolding universe.
So is working on a project, writing, solving a puzzle, working out or playing a sport.
Being in the zone is a way to tether yourself to the now. The past and present do not matter anymore. The same goes for being poor, paralyzed or being a millionaire.
Happiness is a byproduct of action.
Don’t try to be happy. Do what you enjoy. Don’t think about it. Don’t dream about it. Do it. And before you know it, happiness begins flowing in like a river stream.